Day 12 : My relationship with A N G E R

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry as a defensive mechanics when I fear someone or something. So I decided to be angry toward this thing or this person to protect myself from what I did experienced in the past in relationship with that thing or that person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I experience pain and sorrow with someone or something, I decide to be angry toward this person or this thing so I can protect myself from pain and sorrow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that anger make me powerful and give me the power to protect myself from pain and sorrow in all my relationships.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and live in separation and inequality from persons, situations, and things when I become angry.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger when I want something from some persons but they don't do it.  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I can force a person to do something with becoming angry.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger when I see, hear, or experience something I don't like or something that make me feel bad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger when I think/perceive someone or myself doing wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide anxiety with anger, thinking and believing that anger is better than anxiety. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that anger give me relief from anxiety.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that anger give me power and energy to handle and overcome some situations and challenges in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for becoming angry saying : You made me angry. Where in fact I am the only one responsible of the anger I experience as emotions and thoughts. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my attention to what happen outside and make me angry instead of looking at what I am doing in my Mind that is actually creating the reaction of anger and the mood I am experiencing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react with anger instead of establishing and applying Responsibility as the Ability to Respond. With Respond as the application/action of actually facing, understanding and changing "stuff" in my mind that are creating Anger. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make my physical body tight, painful and constricted when I react with anger.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am staying strong by continuously allowing myself to feed this point of anger within me instead of realizing that the anger is indicating to me a point of compounded fear which I have not actually directed effectively, which I am still in separation from.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed anger to consume me and give it power over me, believing that this the way to be strong and powerful. Where actually my true power exist in me being Here as LIFE, stable and breathing.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that Anger can exist within me, only if I participate within the thoughts and energy of anger.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that Anger is the result of accumulating FEARs toward persons or things.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself when facing Anger : to judge the anger as ‘bad’ and immediately suppress it, or I would completely embody the anger and use it to lash out on myself and/or others.

I commit myself to, when and as I face anger as emotion or thoughts : "to stop, and breathe 

I commit myself to, when and as I face thoughts, backchats and imaginations within anger towards another human being : "to stop, to breathe and through Writing, Self-Forgiveness Investigate the reactions, what triggered it within me, Why di I react, Why was I not simply here, stable, in breath, What Memories, past experiences or past relationships that came up in my Mind activated the reactions in that moment. And within the investigation, release myself from the past and all the unresolved issues and problems within me that I was taking out onto/towards the other person.

I commit myself to ask myself the question: if anger comes up within me, what is it that I am trying to show myself? What is it that I am trying to communicate to myself? What is it that I am trying to bring my attention to within myself? And really support myself in the face of anger.