Day 31 : Possesion 7

 

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to walk the process of understanding and also defining my relationship with the word possession and the experience of possession and also the existence of possession or possession moments within myself and in my everyday lives and then also having a look at the more severe cases of thought possession, backchat possession, emotional possession within myself  that I can cycle within for days, weeks and months on end. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to get quite a strong beingness, awareness sense within myself to the extent where even while I am within my momentary possessions in my  everyday life, I am  very much aware of my thoughts, the backchats, the emotional experiences.  And So  I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to change right there the questions that  about asking myself  why am I still in this, in this moment, why am I not breathing, stepping back, doing a forgiveness statement, letting this go and instead understanding the program and pattern and system that triggered within me so that from that understanding and introspection and self-investigation I can take the next step of moving myself into a point of quantum change in the moment through redefining and living a word instead.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be ready to take my relationship with possessions, even the momentary possessions, to the next level of understanding how it can support me with self-movement. I mean momentary possessions of thoughts, backchats, projections, reactions, either in those that trigger in a moment or there is also the other level of possession that can happen where I become obsessed with a way of thinking or backchatting or projecting and reacting within myself. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed  obsession with a point or a pattern or an experience within myself to over time become a full-on possession.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to  walk the process of redefining my relationship with possession because even with possession within myself, being a fear, the fear of being or becoming so possessed by my thoughts or backchats and projections and reactions and experiences and behaviors can in itself kind of linger in the background of my mind to the point where what happens is I then start fearing possessions which would mean that I am then not working with them or through them or introspecting and investigating and understanding myself in relationship to them. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to actually look at the word possession, mind possession, the momentary possessions. And then see them as that, as possessions. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to more just see possessions as intense thoughts and reactions and experiences and my mind is kind of overwhelming me. I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to really have a look at the nature of those moments where my mind takes over completely, or a dimension or a point or a pattern, a system, a program within myself, to see my mind takes over completely, that's a possession, my mind controls me, that part of me on a being awareness level is completely disempowered, victimized, for a moment lost in my footing, in my stand and groundedness within myself.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself  to be in this level of practicing and assisting and supporting myself  to utilize my relationship with possessions as an opportunity to strengthen the definition and living of the word self-movement. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to look at self and movement even within my momentary possessions or my more extensive possessions where I can be in a certain train of thought and backchats and reactions for days, and see that's a possession, my thoughts essentially in my backchats and my experiences are controlling and overwhelming and taking over where I am accepting and allowing the continued participation in those thoughts or backchats and reactions and experiences. And I am on a being awareness and self level, not doing anything to correct my relationship with it or change myself within it and find a solution and direct it once and for all.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I see myself in a possession mini or full, on a being awareness and self level, not do anything to correct my relationship with it or change myself within it and find a solution and direct it once and for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself  to be in a train of thought, so I am  on the train of possession, a possession that is in almost in constant movement within myself,  that is where, something happens in a moment and I react and I stay in that reaction for days on end. Then I have got my more still standing possessions that happen just in one quantum moment and I stay in it for that moment until my thoughts and backchats and reactions kind of,  by itself in that same day kind of release and die off and dissipate or disappear and I don't necessarily think of that moment again.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in obsession possession, the way a possession can also come through by being obsessed with a way of thinking or looking and reacting or responding to something or someone in my life and how that level of possession is a bit more tricky to identify, look at, walk through, because, the way that those thoughts and backchats and inner dialogue and experience has come up within me, it feels so right, so real, so valid, so correct, but I can actually so clearly see the nature of possession within being obsessed by a particular opinion or view or idea or belief by my actions and decisions that I take or make within myself, and my relationship with others.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand  that where I go into a momentary possession and also then where there are some thought patterns and backchats and reaction patterns that's been extended within me that in a way feels like they don't want to leave me, they're coming up all the time, but  if I have a look at my relationship with them, have I really actually confronted them in a way of looking at the nature of possession within them? Why is this particular thought pattern, backchat pattern, reaction pattern, behavioral pattern possessing me? Where is self-movement  not taking place?

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that self-movement can only happen within that real-time moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not  see immediately within my mind many physical references  in relation to the word movement like movement through dancing, a car, a train, walking, running.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that Movement is  naturally programmed within me as physical. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that self-movement is taking the self, my beingness, my awareness into a real physical movement within me, but also on a physical level at the same time.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to practice self movement with possessions and obsessions and link these two variations of possessions that can take place within me and  incorporate the practical solution of real-time living as self-movement, So I can  start strengthening my beingness awareness resolve in relation to the mind.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that beingness awareness resolve in relation to the mind mean where I will find the developing of the skill and the ability within me starting to emerge where my mind will not so easily and readily be able to control me or be able to control me for an extended period of time or be able to control me as extensively because my beingness awareness relationship to the mind in that moment is strengthened and standing and solid in such a way will instead direct myself, the mind, the moment. So it's in that process of control versus direction or directive principle. Because again if I have a look at what is the nature of possession, the nature of possession is control, obsession as well, being obsessed with something or someone the very nature of obsession within the mind is the obsession itself is controlling me and in that control is also possessing me.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that being obsessed either with opinions, views, ideas, beliefs is another mechanism the mind consciousness system use to possess and thus control me. So I need to really get into this process of real-time living of the word direction and direction comes from self-movement because if I honestly have a look I can't direct or go into a direction or move into a direction until I move. I mean if I am just standing still on a path not moving I am not going into any direction at all U am not directing myself, my body, my relationship with the path, nothing.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that I need to take that first step and actually move myself. So in a way I can have a look at my beingness awareness within myself and my relationship with the mind is always only in a way standing still always only being aware and here. I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and  understand that the process that I have been walking within destiny is doing just that just at just taking that first step of establishing an awareness of my beingness within myself and so the mind because if I ever look the more aware I am of my mind the more I see it the more I recognize it the more   there is that part of me that wants to do something about it and that in itself is also a process of  doing something about it meaning what does it mean to direct what does it mean to change what does it mean to stand what does it to move so I am now in that process.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that I have walked for  years expanding my awareness within the mind now I see enough I know enough I can recognize enough and acknowledge enough to do something about it and that doing something about it is within the self-movement and the self-movement is again coming back to the basics of actually doing and  this moment this movement of self no one can do for me and this is important for me to remember and realize that I can be as aware of my mind as I want but if I am not going to do something with that awareness and actually moving myself and directing myself nothing will change. if I am just going to stand on that path which is just being aware of myself or my immediate environment then nothing is going to move nothing's going to change I can't discover explore experience. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not  look at introspecting and investigating this point for myself 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to expand on and specify the practical process of of self-movement of beingness movement of awareness movement within me in moments in momentary possessions and also the more extended possessions  the still standing possessions and the train like movement possessions so to already have a look at just being playing with my redefining and living of the word self-movement what does it mean to move me my being in and as my awareness in this moment into practical living when I notice and is aware of and can acknowledge that I'm in a possession and what changes within me and the moment and my experience when I actually practically move myself. I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself  to try and test and play with this independently, independent meaning first give it a go for myself try it out test it play with it be innovative be creative and then expand on some groundwork foundation definitions and references for  self-movement and I can cross reference okay this is what i played with tested and checked for myself this is what worked what didn't work then let's see what more can i learn. 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that self-movement having that skill within me developed will minimize and possibly even prevent the continued relationship of control and possession of my mind conscious and systems that I can break free from  those systems because when I can break free from control and possession of my mind I am  gifting myself  gift of create creation of self-creation but the moment my mind is still controlling and possessing me on levels it really makes the process of creation so much more challenging because the more I would want to try and create the more the mind will kind of fight back and control and possess.