Day 36 : The overwhelming DESIRE

 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Fall into this experience of desire Pulling myself toward a possession and not accepting and allowing myself to take physical reality into consideration

 I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to remain here with me as the physical body as breath in real physical reality But almost accepted and allowed myself to fall down to a Inter-dimensional cliff as energy in my obsession and possession with desire

 I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to remain stable here in physical reality and always assessing my decisions with an equality and oneness with the physical consequence and what is best for all principle and no more Accepting and allowing myself to just blindly follow desire,

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience  desire, as as an overwhelming experience. It is like when desire emerge within myself, it has got like this nature to it where I just can't resist it. It is like I am standing in front of that moment and this desire comes and it's like I in a way want to but I also don't want to because I am considering what's moving within my mind is all past instances, moments or relationships that are similar or the same to this potential moment.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as desire experience comes it just drowns everything away in my mind and I like just go for it. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that desire is also its often or frequent attached to fear in that I will be in a desire but at the same time there will be a fear as well in how I go into that internal conflict for a moment in terms of I want to but I don't. But I can't stop myself. Oh and there I go. And I then give in to the particular specific desire.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that for most part often with desire it's like it just comes up in a moment and I just automatically go for it. So what desire is in its very nature and its very substance is interestingly enough quite childlike. Childlike meaning not taking into consideration reality, reality consequence, not making an informed decision, taking all possibilities and probabilities into consideration.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to exemplify maturity in terms of when faced with something or someone to first look at it really through the eyes of reality. Who I am in relation to this decision. What are the possible or probable reality outflows or consequences.How would this moment change me, change my life. All of those things are of a mature mind. But then we get into desire.

 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see realize and understand that desire doesn't take any of that into consideration at all. Desire in itself is like a little kid kind of saying come, come, come. I want to go. I want to go. I want to do this. I want to do this. Which is like what children do to their parents. But often parents have to be strict in saying no to them. Because let's say the child for example wanted a particular toy or beverage or food. But the child doesn't understand the relationship to money yet for example. And so therefore the parent have to say no to the child. Obviously throw like a temper tantrum obviously. Because they cannot understand that it's right there. Why can't they have it? And this is something that desire does as well. It takes me into that state of mind. That state of being and physical experience of it's right there. I just need to take it and then I've got it and then it's mine. And within this if let's say the child for example would have gone for that beverage or that food or the particular toy. And that would have led into an exceptional consequence in the parent. In their mind. In their life. And would have affected a lot more from just that one point. That the child would have indulged in. In terms of following their particular one need or desire. 

So within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to understand that I may see that desire right in front of me. But the consequence of accepting and allowing self to indulge would be more far reaching and more physical and more real and definitive.

 

So in this with desire. Now one may have already within interviews that have been walked by different beings. Had a look at the substance and the nature of desire in itself.

 

In terms of first again before we get to that in the relationship to desire and fear. In the sense that a part of you does know or do consider. That in facing that desire that there may be consequence.

 

You know and or that if you do indulge in this desire. You don't know where it might go. Where it may lead to or if it will lead to anything in particular.

 

And now we're more specifically having a look at the context of relationships and sex for example. And within this how one would in that moment be in that fear and desire at the same time. And what's fascinating that happens for most part.

 

Is that as you're in that momentary inner conflict between fear and desire. It's actually the fear that point of consequence. That one is aware of that potentially exists.

 

That actually fuels the experience of the desire more. And then propels you into acting on your desire experience or reaction. When what was really more dominant within you was the fear in relationship to the desire.

 

So thus desire in itself one can investigate. In terms of an interesting dynamic in the mind or consciousness in relation to desire. Is that one had created particular desires in one's mind.

 

In one's imagination. But what would fuel the desire even more is the prospect or the fear of not having it in your life. Losing it or not experiencing it at all.

 

Because this is what humanity do in relation to the imagination. In relation to consciousness the mind. In that one creates the life that you want, need and desire already within it.

 

And you can have a look at when you were really young. And you were participating in various imaginations and fantasies of relationships, of sex, of perfect man. Or perfect woman.

 

And that accumulated energy in your mind as where you had attached so much self-definition to that. That one now get to a point of not seeing such imaginations or fantasies. Existent within this actual real physical reality.

 

Then a fear of loss or a fear emerge of whether I am ever going to be able to experience such things. Or be in such relationships. And then one for example see one's friends or social networks start being introduced to relationships.

 

To hugging and kissing and touching and sex and all sorts of things. And this then fuel the fear even more in relationship to your mind and imagination. And from there the origin more that fuel thus desire later in life is fear.

 

Is fear of not materializing and manifesting your self-definition that you actually created in your own mind. So then you start going out looking for the type of relationship that you created in your mind. That you have defined yourself as.

 

So that you can live it and experience your self-definition in actual real physical reality. And one's signifying point for example of when one had found one's self-definition. That correlate to one's self-definition in the mind.

 

Here the desire within the starting point of fear starts rising more and more and more and more. I mean this is why even also for example one night stands. Or just flirting or having a fling and things like that.

 

Are connected to desire and so also fear. Because you in some way in the past imagined yourself within such experiences. Defined yourself to it and now you are looking at searching for that self-definition.

 

To really live it out in physical reality. And the fear and desire come up in the same time from the perspective that. It would obviously be a lot different now from going from imagination.

 

Into actual physical reality for example. So that also brings up in fear. And the fact that you are right here in front of your desire.

 

In front of your opportunity to materialize and manifest your imagination. And yet at the same time you realize that you didn't take everything into consideration. With materializing or manifesting your wants needs and desires.

 

And so a lot of subconscious and unconscious mind fears would come up. But eventually it rises to such an extent that. It manifests into where you believe that you're experiencing an overwhelmingness of desire.

 

But it's actually an overwhelmingness of fear that is fueling the desire. So as we have explained in the relationship to desire is really like a child like mind. That do not take reality or reality consequence into consideration.

 

So with desire one have to consider that one is really not. Self-aware or in any way indirect of principle. Over who one is in relationship to self the physical and reality.

 

And the human being that one is facing within that moment. And so therefore that desire is thus a form of possession. And so therefore within facing desire.

 

One require being essentially really strict with yourself. In how desire can really pull your mind beingness and physical relationship. Into a direction and dimension that once you take that step.

 

It could become quite consequential in that you won't know what is ahead. And what outflow consequence may manifest. If you extend yourself into following or falling into that desire.

 

Whereas within first referencing yourself physical reality. The individual the moment the decision and taking everything into consideration. One can predict essentially probabilities and possibilities.

 

And then from there align and prepare yourself to be able to take responsibility. For if or as one do make whatever decision that one can see it through. One can walk it through and one can remain stable.

 

Within any probable or possible consequence outflows. So in this one want to thus have a look at one's relationship to desire. And you know especially when it comes to relationship dynamics.

 

Because for most part such desire is directly linked to where one had imaginations to someone. Or something similar that one is trying to embody or manifest materialize and live out. And one really have to see and ensure that the moment doesn't become.

 

About exerting or living out imaginations and fantasies. Within your mind that accumulated energy throughout the years. That essentially just want to embody themselves into your physical body.

 

And live themselves out. You know it's got nothing then really personally to do. With self.

 

With who you are. And so therefore that one then in the moment first assess. Okay you know this is this desire.

 

Desire. Whoa. Wait.

 

Breathe. Release. Let go.

 

Let me first really practically take everything in that's happening here. And then make a decision. I mean even within and during that process of stabilizing yourself in relationship to desire.

 

One will feel like but I want to. But I must it's right here. You know your physical body will almost go into like a form of tension.

 

As though you are not giving your body or yourself an energy fix. If you will. Like a real energy drug addictive response.

 

If you say to yourself in taking that breath just for a moment. Whoa. And really have a look at what's happening here.

 

And if this is really practical and viable. Within oneself and one's life. So now let's get into the self-forgiveness sounding process.

 

So when an energy becomes overwhelming. Such as for example desire. This is now when one kind of became aware of it a little bit too late.

 

And it's already quite in your mind and in your body. And your heart rate is already quite up. And your breathing is a lot faster.

 

And your body is like already just automatically going toward that person for example. Then one want to get into making simply short direct immediate statements for yourself. And in the context of the desire energy.

 

It's one want to have a look at it being in the context of for example. No. Stop.

 

No more. Breathe. And you breathe in and out.

 

And you see how the energy move within yourself. And if it is not stabilizing. And the energy is still becoming more and more and more overwhelming.

 

Then you don't do anything but to utilize breathing. Because if an energy like desire especially. Becomes so overwhelming in your mind and your body.

 

Anything you say. Sounds in a way what they say when you are being arrested. Meaning anything you say will be used against you.

 

Will be used against you. In that because your whole starting point. Your whole mind.

 

Your whole beingness. And your whole body. Is now this overwhelming energy of desire.

 

Right. No matter if you say stop. Or no.

 

Or I do not accept and allow this. I'm in direct of principle. I breathe.

 

What happens is. And I'm sure many have experiences as well. And we have said it to yourself.

 

But it's like the more you say it. The more the same reaction accumulates. That's because you are the words you speak.

 

As the words you speak reflect and represent who you are. So within this. If you are desire.

 

No matter what the words or the meaning or the definition of the words is. You in your beingness is substantiating the words. As the very energy that you have become.

 

So therefore no matter what you say. You're just going to accumulate your very beingness. Your very mind physical substance.

 

As the energy that you are. And therefore fuel it even more. All right.

 

So why be so direct and stern. And assertive with regards to desires. Because as we've said.

 

It's like a child that's throwing a tantrum. That you really have to stop. And explain to them in a way that you know.

 

No. There's consequence if you go for that. So within this.

 

You simply do the same in your own relationship with the desire. It is no. I do not accept and allow this.

 

I'm the directive principle of me in this moment. In every moment of breath. And even if then that does not work.

 

Where one speak those direct immediate statements. One realize. Okay.

 

I've spoken them. But desire is still becoming more and more and more. Then one has to do breathing.

 

And just breathing. In breathing one stabilize oneself back into. And as the physical body.

 

This one can do for a moment. Excusing yourself from the individual. From the human beings.

 

And just going somewhere where you can breathe. And be with yourself. And just stabilize everything.

 

And while you're doing that. Just really have a look at the decision. That is in front of you or before you.

 

Is it viable? Is it practical? What would the consequences be? And or you know. Where let's say. One would have in that particular desire.

 

Just immediately like gone into. A physical or sexual relationship with the person. And then you first calmed yourself.

 

And stabilize yourself. In relationship to the physical. And you realize.

 

But you know what. Let's see what other more potential exists. You know with this person.

 

That maybe you even then realize. That you actually read them completely wrong. In your desire possession.

 

In that they're actually quite gentle. They seem a little bit you know shyish. So you may first really start with communication.

 

For example. So there's also a lot in how desire possession. Can take you over to not see the reality of things.

 

And read the other human being. For example correctly. So rather be prepared.

 

In terms of what it is that you may and might face. Within physical reality. And not pursue things in energy possessions.

 

But always be clear. Always be certain. Always be preparing the way before you.

 

So that whatever decisions or directions you go into. You know that you've taken all the probabilities. And possibilities into consideration.

 

So this is also quite a similar point to. The fear that we had discussed. Where you know where we looked at more the mild fear.

 

But here we're getting now into an overwhelmingness of desire. And we will also explain in terms of what to do when the fears become more severe. Because we've said even in the overwhelmingness of the desire.

 

Speaking the self-forgiveness. In and as that energy is going to be futile. Because as you've said it's like in energy.

 

Meanings and definitions of words in the mind become irrelevant. What becomes relevant is the energy. And what your consciousness really does in your beingness.

 

As the words you're speaking. Is it fuel everything with that energy as desire. For example.

 

So this is also why you know we do writing and then self-forgiveness. The writing takes you to a point of observation and stability. In connecting to your awareness within your physical body to look at things.

 

In that writing phase you are preparing yourself to instability. Have a look at a point that you're now going to be walking through in self-forgiveness. This then assists and supports your self-forgiveness.

 

To really be done within that starting point of observation. Of understanding. Of stability.

 

And simultaneously within that open up more things. So your writing and your self-forgiveness go hand in hand in that process. Because I mean as many of you may have noticed as well.

 

Sometimes you can do self-forgiveness while in an energy. And then you know your self-forgiveness can come out quite nasty or depressing. Or things like that.

 

Because you didn't really forgive yourself. You were speaking in an energy and as an energy. And therefore actually validating a personality or an emotion and feeling even more.

 

See this is how and the extent to which our responsibility exists within who we are. In and as the words we speak and use. And within that when you thus face desire and freely overwhelms.

 

Your breathing process is like your writing process. It's like quantum writing. You are stabilizing yourself just back into your awareness.

 

Your physical body. And then from there one can within oneself if or as one have time. Walk some self-forgiveness in a sounding way.

 

Which we will get into in the next interview. In some examples of sounding self-forgiveness when facing desire. But all of this to understand primarily in how the mind's consciousness can so completely disregard things even in itself.

 

When it comes to energy. Putting energy and energy experience above the reality of how things really exist. And even in the mind.

 

Where even words and meaning of words can become futile or irrelevant. I mean that's actually all quite frightening when you really have a look at it. In that you cannot just blindly trust words even within yourself.

 

You have to be the word you speak and make sure that you in fact are those words that you speak. Or that you write. Or that you walk self-forgiveness within and as.

 

You know that they're genuine. That they're real. That you are really forgiving yourself.

 

And in this process. So now we thus have the platform that we have walked in this interview with regards to desire when it gets overwhelming. You first speak the statement to see okay where are you in your relationship to the desire and your awareness and physical body.

 

How far is the possession essentially. Um this you can assess through after you've done that absolute stern strict directive statement. If or as the desire is still overwhelming and it actually became more overwhelming after that.

 

Then you know okay you have to get yourself somewhere where you can just breathe and breathe through the energy. So that before you make a decision you can be of a sound mind. And not unnecessarily get yourself into trouble or consequence that you're not prepared for.

 

Through accepting and allowing yourself to follow an energy possession. Alright so we'll go up to here for in this interview and in the next interview give you some examples of how to sound self-forgiveness in facing desire. Thank you.