Day 90: Self-Forgiveness on Parenting, Responsibility & Fear of Failure



These past days, I faced one of the deepest fears and points of pain in my life — my relationship with my son, with my ex-wife, and with myself as a father. My son failed in school this year. His words hit me like a storm:

"ما بقاش شي معنا لهاد الحيات"
"نتوما سباب... نتا أو أمي أو عمي..."

These words awakened old emotions: regret, guilt, fear, and self-blame. And also, the hidden anger I held toward myself and toward others — emotions I didn’t fully want to face.

Today, I choose to face them with responsibility. Not to justify. But to forgive myself, and realign myself.

🔹 Self-Forgiveness Statements

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a failed father because my son failed in school, instead of seeing that I can stand and become a support from this moment forward.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the judgment of others — my ex-wife, my son, society — instead of breathing, grounding myself, and taking responsibility in self-honesty.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at my ex-wife when she said I was not supporting my son, instead of realizing that this anger hides my own guilt and regret.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid communicating consistently with my son, convincing myself that I’m not capable, instead of finding small daily actions to support and be present in his life.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the word “نفقة” because of past court cases and money instability, instead of breathing and taking practical steps to stabilize my income.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in survival, not prioritizing building a structure where I can truly support my son — emotionally, financially, and educationally.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I ruined my son’s life, instead of standing up now to show him a new example: that change is possible, and that no failure defines us.

🛠️ Self-Correction and Commitment

  • When and as I feel overwhelmed by guilt or anger about my past as a father, I stop, I breathe.

  • I realize that I can only support my son by becoming stable in my own life.

  • I commit myself to building daily habits that allow me to work, grow, and support my son consistently.

  • When and as I hear words from my son or ex-wife that trigger regret or defense in me, I stop, I breathe.

  • I realize that these are mirrors — showing me the parts I still judge in myself.

  • I commit to listening without judgment, speaking honestly, and walking the path of real change.

🌱 Closing

I cannot change the past.
But I can decide who I am from now on.
And I decide: I am here. I take responsibility. I walk this path for myself, and also for my son — not to fix him, but to be an example.

“True support begins when blame ends.”
“Forgiveness opens the space for new direction.”


Location: Agadir 80000, Maroc

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